Presenter, blogger, vlogger, media contributor, Mum (not in any order!) Trying to work out this parenting thing & documenting it in my own unique and real way x

To the blogger who copied me …

To the blogger who copied me, I don’t really know where to start …

Don’t worry, I am not going to name you because I am not that mean, and I somehow feel you must have had your reasons for doing it.

I have also AGONISED over writing this, for fear of being shunned by the blogging community, a community that I already find big and scary sometimes.  But it’s not me who has done wrong.

Ultimately I felt compelled to write this post because I am experiencing a real mix of emotions – I’m baffled, hurt, pee’d off, confused and angry all in one.

And the thing is, you haven’t been all that clever in covering your tracks.

A few months ago I saw you write a post on a blogger’s group – frustrated that you didn’t know how to get one of your posts to go viral.  I read the whole thread and in it you were talking to other bloggers about the ins and outs of going viral and saying that a viral post doesn’t actually help a blogger to get recognised anyway.  You said something along the lines of;

“of course there was that girl who wrote the piece about xxxx and that went viral, but can I remember her name? No, of course I can’t.”

At the time I almost choked when I read it, as it was blatantly about me.  But I swallowed it and moved on with my busy life, trying to juggle being a new mum and a freelancer.

But then months later, during the travellings and sharings of a blogger – I see your post!

Yes the words aren’t identical, but the title, the premise, the vibe and the intonation are ALL THE SAME.

To make sure I am not going crazy I have run it past a few pairs of eyes, and they all concur.

Yes I know bloggers overlap, especially parenting ones.  There is only so much stuff to write about.  But this, this is just too much.

Thing is, it would have been really nice if perhaps you had cited my work, or started your piece with a little note to say you had been inspired by my post and wanted to write something similar.  That would have just been you know – kind and polite and all that.

And isn’t that ‘blogger code’ anyway?

You know what else? I’m not a big blogger.  I probably won’t ever be.  I blog because I love writing.  It is that simple. It’s my hobby.

I don’t make money from my blog bar the odd little item to review, and I doubt I ever will.

I don’t spend hours on blogging groups linking up with all the top bloggers because I simply don’t have time.

I haven’t won a blogging award and I don’t suppose I ever will.  I’ll leave that to the big boys.

But I have loved writing since I was a tiny person, and to have even ONE person read my ramblings makes me a happy bunny. I am humble in my writing, and that is the way I will stay.

That post, the one that you copied is also something I’m very proud of. I wrote it, in my PJs, completely sleep deprived with a tiny weeny baby who I was struggling to keep up with and feed.

I had no idea it would get the reception it did – but a few nights later when I randomly saw it being shared all over twitter and on parenting websites,  I actually cried a little tear. It made my baby blues a tiny bit more bearable.

I will finish up by saying that when I was about 6, I recall a girl in my class who kept copying all my clothes and everything I had and did.  Perplexed I asked my mum why and she said;

“Don’t worry – imitation is the greatest form of flattery.  It’s annoying but you should be pleased.”

I am desperately trying to hang onto that.

My mum also taught me never to copy someone else’s homework.  Because if I did, and got great marks, I’d never feel good about it.

But this has confirmed one thing for me – I’m going to keep writing, just for me.  I hope you do the same.

(Oh and because I think figures bother you, ‘that’ post of mine has had approx 275,000 views and you know what, I have no idea AT ALL if that’s ‘great’. You probably have waaaay more.  If that’s the case, congrats)

 

to the blogger who copied me

 

 

23 Responses to To the blogger who copied me …

  1. Omg, what a bloody cheek Charlie.
    Your response is nicely written and heartfelt. Hopefully it will make them feel some shame.
    Deb xxx

  2. Thank you for writing this, it really struck a chord. In the last week I’ve spotted a magazine which used one of my photographs (I think because it’s on the venue’s website) and a fellow blogger who seems to be imitating my style – which is really strange because I’m not a big blogger either. Like you, I feel a little baffled and confused, particularly as the blogger had mentioned admiring my style. I’m going to take your advice and keep my head down and write and try and remember the imitation is flattery phrase too.

    And 275,000 sounds utterly amazing to me – congrats. And congrats for just keeping on writing for your own sake. That’s something I need to learn to do too. So thank you.

    • Hi Laura, how annoying! I’m annoyed for you?! Have you messaged the magazine? That is just down right rude. As for the blogger, I guess we have to feel sorry for them. It’s just odd isn’t it? Especially when it’s so obvious! Thanks for taking the time to comment x

  3. This is post is a gracious and mature response to such a tough situations. Sometimes it all gets so…icky. Petty stuff gets in the way of a love for writing and that makes me so sad. Keep doing what you’re doing, you do it so bloody well 🙂 mrs C x

  4. Oh no! The first time this happened to me I was so annoyed but unfortunately there is just nothing we can do about it!

    I have spoken to a few bloggers since who have experienced it too – i think it is just a shitty aspect of the blogging world. Try not to sweat it and carry on doing what you are doing. Your subscribers/followers will know yours are the originals and that’s all that matters!

    • thanks lovely! It’s so true, nowt we can do about it. Think I just wanted to vent on my blog, because my blog is a good place for me to let off steam, or I might have kicked a bin or something! Were you at the MADs this wkd? How did you do? x

      • Well, that is the point of a blog. I wish I had done this actually – stopped me moaning to my husband about it!! MADs was good thanks… I didn’t win but we got free wine and food so I am happy with that!

  5. Wow, well done, I am sure you will get support from the blogging community and never be shunned. Bloggers that copy, dont have the imagination to write for themselves.

    Well done for being so brave by writing this and helping other bloggers to realise they are not the only ones that get their work copied

  6. It gets me so mad that some people cant think for themselves, so they need to steal from other people…is ok karma is more than real.

  7. A well done written responce… Don’t worry I am sure the person who copied you is now full of shame.! Keep writing you are great !
    And keep that quote in your mind:
    “If people start coping you, it means you are unique”
    🙂

  8. Your blog post really struck a cord with me for two reasons:
    1.I also love writing.
    2. My work was copied in a similar way to yours only a few days ago.
    So, I fully sympathise. Keep writing and expressing yourself. This is the most precious thing.
    I started using http://www.copyscape.com to keep an eye out for people who can’t be original. 🙂

    Best wishes from Italy

  9. Oh dear, well I’m coming at this from the opposite direction to everyone else I guess! I applaud you for writing the post as it’s a brave one but I think this is tricky territory to be honest. In the last few months, I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve thought of an idea or even written an entire post only to find just a few days later someone else trots out (or already had in the past which is even worse) an almost identical one. Do I go ahead and publish and say ‘I had this idea first but this blogger pipped me to it but no I’m not copying this person’ or just not publish? I’ve not published a few times for fear of being accused of plagiarism. All that work for nothing. It’s demoralising. There are millions of blogs so surely there’s no such thing as an original idea? I like your original post but babies not sleeping is possibly the most popular hot parenting topic so of course others will write about it and there are certain styles that lend themselves well to this topic. And when it comes to parenting blogs, fact is, we all experience/want to discuss the same stages. If I start focussing on trying not to write anything that’s been done before, I may need to stop blogging! A classic example is my latest post on Types of Parent. It’s been done a gazillion times before in that format. But I was still inspired to write it from my own experiences and that popular style was the only one that was right for what I wanted to say. I hope this throws some light (if that’s the correct phrase) on the other side so to speak.
    I also put this on the #BloggingMumsClub thread.
    On another note, nice to come across your blog. I’ll be back!

  10. I’m so glad you posted this Charlie, good for you. This has happened to me – a few times and I have seen it happen to others too. I find it incredibly rude and really quite shocking so I hope your brave post sends a message to people who seem to find it okay to lift the style of a post so blatantly and use it as their own original idea.

    Yes, there are common things to write about – sleep, babies, feelings around motherhood – of course! It’s not about a common subject, or even writing from a baby’s perspective – it’s the style or using the same angle or even format of the piece (which have all happened to me). As others say, though there isn’t anything we can do, it does really piss me off – incredibly rude and I would never take someone else’s work and ‘recreate’ as my own. There are loads of things I wish I’d written, but you know what? I didn’t. Instead, I share blog posts I love on my social media, I acknowledge that I enjoyed them, that they moved me or made me laugh or think. I don’t copy them, that is all kinds of lame, and all kinds of wrong.

    Keep going though lady – what you write is shared because it is GOOD, that’s all you need to remember.

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To the blogger who copied me …

by RealGirlRamblings time to read: 3 min