Finding ‘happiness’ is the holy grail of life right?
But how many of us consider ourselves HAPPY?
It’s a difficult one to quantify isn’t it? Because in order to feel happiness, you have to feel all the other colours in between, including the dark ones.
The older I get the more I think about how to be happy, and what it means.
I think by nature, I am not very good at being happy. I am a Scorpio – I over think everything and I am extremely self-critical. I also feel hurt and pain deeply, especially if another human inflicts that hurt on me.
But I want to get better at being ‘happy’.
Don’t get me wrong – I feel happiness, every day. I just wish I was better at holding onto the good stuff, and better at letting go of the bad.
The happiest two people I know are my fiancé Jay, and my youngest brother Rory. Both two entirely different personalities, but just great at always seeing the positive side of life.
Anyone who knows Jay reading this will probably laugh at the idea of him being happy! He has carved out a bit of a personality for himself on the radio as being a bit of a moany old git! But most of that is an act. He is without doubt, one of the most contented people I know.
Are happiness and contentment the same thing? I reckon they are pretty closely related.
My friend sent me this today ….
I read this and thought ‘yes’! I think we are all guilty of this – partly due to the complicated lives we now live.
“I’ll be happier when we get a new house”
“I’ll be happy when I get that promotion”
“I’ll be happy when my baby is in nursery and I get some time to myself”
“I’ll be happy when I have another child”
“I’ll be happy when I have more money”
“I’ll be happy when I have those shoes / bag / clothes”
I do sometimes wonder if I’d be happy if I let go of the material clutter in my life, shut down the social media and jumped in a campervan with my little family and went round the world, exploring and making memories. But again – is that just me looking elsewhere for happiness, rather than living the life I have right now?
Last year my mum very sadly lost one of her best friends to cancer at a horribly young age. But she never complained and was a bright, positive force until the very end. I think of her often, and in turn think about how I can become a more positive person.
I’m definitely guilty of ‘destination addiction’. Most people I know are. I know it’s something I need to work on.
Right this second Noah is hanging onto my leg and whining. He’s done it 24/7 since he’s been ill bless him. If he could be inside my skin with me, he would. It’s hard. It’s infuriating. I haven’t left the house in four days because we’ve been poorly. But I am trying to see the happiness in it – quality time with my boy, seconds I’ll never get back.
The little things that I know I’ll look back on when I’m 80 (god willing) and cherish with all my heart. (Even the moaning, the grouchiness and the inability to even go to the loo by myself for 30 seconds!)